Are YOU saved?

And here I thought I was running away from the Holy Land.

This morning, I got a call from Pastor David. I met Pastor David in a store in Uganda - It's fairly normal to give your contact info out to everyone you meet here. People seem to have a habit of collecting phone numbers as they go about their daily routines. By my first week here my phone book was filled with names I couldn't even associate with a face/place, eventually I found a mini-solution, and now I have entries like "Immaculee fr/ Pharmacy" "Innocent waiter" or, my favorite, "Faith fr/ Zion".

But back to Pastor David. Upon finding out I was Palestinian, he asked if I was Muslim (Again, I thought I left these questions behind).
- uh, not really anything. My family's Christian.
- Are you saved?
- Um...

I had to ask friends about this - "Saved" seems to signify Born Again, or some other form of fanatic churchgoer. It is used in sentences such as "He pretended to be Saved so he could get free music lessons" (judgmental) or "I used to be Muslim, but I'm Saved" (beaming, proud). Or, in it's most frequently encountered form: "Are you Saved?"

Until now, I still can't get used to saying "No" without feeling like i need to be hanging my head in shame, or pleading for help.

Annette's grandfather, who has rarely left the village, was Saved. He sat me down and forced his grandaughter to translate a good half hour of zealous preaching. He told me he used to be a sinner (and proceeded to list his sins, one by one - the most entertaining part). I tried to politely end this session with a "don't worry, I promise I don't sin!"

But I only got a disgusted, patronizing "but of COURSE you do!"

This was one among many encounters with various forms of reversed missionary activity. People stop me all the time and tell me about how they're saved, how often they go to church, and how great God is. Pastor David called me this morning (from Uganda!) to make sure I found the Church he told me about, and to give me the contact info of his pastor friends.

So I've narrowed the possible reasons for this down to three options:

1) They think I'm white and have some sort of remnant of colonial inferiority complex and feel the need to prove their status as Good Christians, ad nauseum.

2) The tables have turned and Africa, (which has the fastest growing Christian population in the world and among the most frequently attended churches) now feels the need to spread the Good Word to anyone who will listen.

3) I look like I'm Living In Sin.



No need to cast your votes.